Wednesday, September 19, 2012

spring cleaning in the fall -or- the "Follow Me" sermon series at Christ Community

This week is the start of my fall break at work... 3 blissful weeks of not working!  So what do I do?  Spring clean like I should have in the spring.  But Brick came in the spring so I out of commission.

Today, I tackled under my bed... the more stuff I pulled out, the more memories came.  Good memories, sad memories.  Lots of movies- and the memories associated with those times.  Despite the memories and all the dust stirred up, it was good to clean out and throw some things away.

"Why am I holding on to these things?"  I thought several times.

And then I thought about the sermons of the past few weeks at Christ Community...

- a call to come and die to self

- take up our crosses and follow Jesus

- to abandon our will to His and obey

But just like the reasons I had for holding on to all these things that were under my bed, I have reasons for holding on to spiritual things...

- I don't want to be a victim again

- I am scared of the pain

- I feel like I lack the resources to do what He has asked of me

I know that the Lord is saying to me TAKE MY YOKE AND YOU WILL FIND REST (Matthew 11:29).

I know that the Lord is saying to me to LIVE FOR AN AUDIENCE OF ONE.

I know that He is saying DO NOT BE AFRAID... THE BATTLE IS MINE.

It seems like every day, I have to go through this pep talk... reminding myself who God IS and who I am in HIM.  So I will just keep giving myself this pep talk every day... hopefully, it will become part of my spiritual DNA soon.  And while I chide myself for having to go through this same ole talk every single day... for allowing myself to get to this place over and over again... I do celebrate the fact that the Lord is gracious and merciful towards me... even if I wait until the fall to do my spring cleaning.


Thursday, September 13, 2012

Love you anyway...

When Heath and I were first married, we argued like young married people do... and one time, after I apologized for my mistake, I said, "just love me anyway..."  So it's been a running thing with us when we make a mistake against the other... after the apology comes the "just love me anyway, okay?"

This past week, after Hero misbehaved, I put him to bed after disciplining him and I said, "You know that I love you anyway, right?"  Of course he doesn't... but I had to tell him that I still love him despite his actions.

Of course this made me think about how God love us anyway... despite making the same mistakes over and over again...

Then tonight, Hero jumped on me while I was sitting on the floor and said "I love you, Mommy!"
"Aw, I love you, too, Hero!"  I said.
"Yeah, Mommy, I love you anyway!"
I chuckled... "I'm glad you love me anyway... I get upset and tired a lot and I need you to love me anyway!"